I’m a father of a newborn baby
You’re now officially a parent of a newborn baby! A dad. Congrats! Your new family is complete, your child is healthy and growing! I’m happy for you, dad! Remember when you had just heard the good news? How time flies! I’m sure you’re thinking to yourself, “why am I reading this blog post right now, I should be taking care of the baby or getting bottles ready or something!” Not to worry, I won’t be long, I know you have your hands full, but I wanted to let you know that I’m here to lend an ear or a shoulder to cry on if you need it.
Over the last 24 hours (at least, maybe less if your lady was one of the lucky ones) you both have experienced a lot. For the mother of your newborn, she has cried, fought, endured the physical and emotional pain that we as men will never have the opportunity to feel. Whatever you do, do not mention how tired you are (cause you’re not) or say anything like how you understand just how they feel, because you don’t. You never will and that’s okay.
A friend once told me that women are given the grace to endure the traumatic experience that is childbirth. Ask any women postpartum and they’ll tell you how badly they miss the baby inside of their stomach. Some may say that they want another one. Think about it, if someone offered you $100k but you had to have your body ripped apart and go through the most painful experience of your life, chances are you would say no. If you eventually did work up the balls to do it you probably wouldn’t be too quick to sign up for it again.
Grace, something that we men suck at sometimes but for women they see the beauty that is childbirth. They go from a state of bliss, move to excruciating pain then, on to a state of euphoria. This is when they finally know what it is to love unconditionally. it’s really an amazing thing.
Now, if you had the chance to be in the room with your partner you would undoubtedly have seen and heard some things that you two had not yet crossed in your relationship. If it wasn’t real before then it just got real. Your relationship has now been taken to a whole new level. Sorry, guys. Between her water breaking and all the nurses and doctors checking her cervix to see how much it had dilated. There is also the white film and the blood, (oh em gee, the blood). Then there are the screams, curse words, sweat and nail marks on your hands. You two have formed (or renewed) a bond that can never be broken. If you didn’t have the opportunity to be in the room then you really missed out and for that, I’m so sorry.
A story for another day
Now, with my wife and our twins, we didn’t experience a conventional birth with our boys and I’ll get into that in a later post but to be beside her encouraging her (even though she just wanted me to shut up), holding her hand, seeing her go through what she did, for us, for our boys, proud does not even begin to describe how that made me feel. I wouldn’t have traded any of our 22 hours for anything else.
Anyway, you’re home now and I am so happy for you both. Congratulations. Go and enjoy you new family and remember if you ever need to talk or cry, vent whatever, I’m here. Send me an email, leave a comment, I’d love to chat. It’s now that we need to cheer each other on more than ever.
Until next time
The Unfit Dad